after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
He did a backflip because drugs
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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