at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize