Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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