I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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