There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
