A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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