Tell her she can't have a vagina
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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