girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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