I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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