Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
We left an ass print on the piano.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
