And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
