i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
