i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
