so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
