So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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