well most of my day revolves around power hour
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
