i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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