South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
