just got booed by the entire restaurant.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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