have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Randomize
