I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
