He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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