No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Randomize
