Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
