were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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