Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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