She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
