i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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