We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize