how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Randomize
