they need to just BURY HIM!
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
