dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
fuck your aforementioned shoe
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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