if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
