I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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