it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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