I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
