Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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