Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
