somebody snuck up and got me drunk
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
