My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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