when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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