im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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