WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
