Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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