i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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