You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Someone signed my nipple.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize