he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
