i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
