either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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