try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
